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Blondes Norwood Mass
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"My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop
dying."
- Ed Furgol
Clever Blonde
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet $20,000.00 on a single roll of the dice.
She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude."
With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!"
Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. She then picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"
The other answered, "I don't know I thought YOU were watching!"
Moral: Not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men!!!
The Bet
A blonde and her brunette roommate are
watching the 7:00 news when a story about a
man who's threatening to jump off of a
bridge comes on.
The brunette turns to the blonde and says
"I'll bet you 75 bucks he jumps"
the blonde agrees.
Sure enough the guy jumped off the bridge.
The blonde starts counting out the 75
dollars when her roommate has a twinge of
guilt.
"I can't take your money" she
says, "I kinda cheated you. I saw the
story on the 5:00 news on another station.
" "Oh so did I" replied the
blonde "but I wouldn't have jumped the
second time"
The BET 2
A blonde and a redhead met in a bar
after work for a drink, and were watching
the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown
threatening to jump from the Brooklyn
Bridge. The blonde bet the redhead $50 that
he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied,
"I'll take that bet!"
Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the
blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owed.
The redhead said "I can't take
this, you're my friend." 
The blonde
said "No. A bet's a bet."
So the
redhead said "Listen, I have to admit,
I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I
can't take your money."
The blonde
replied "Well, so did I, but I never
thought he'd jump again!"
Peel and Win
A blonde goes into a restaurant and notices there's a "peel and win" sticker
on her coffee cup.
So she's peels it off and starts screaming,
"I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"
The waitress says, "That's impossible.
The biggest prize is a free lunch."
But the blonde keeps screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor
home!"
Finally the manager comes over and says, "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're
mistaken.
You couldn't possibly have won a motor home because we didn't have that as a
prize!"
The blonde says, "No it's not a mistake. I've won a motor home!"
She hands the ticket to the manager and he reads...
" W I N A B A G E L"
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